Identifying and using core values
List Of Values
We are constantly required to make decisions about our actions. From breakfast food to career choices; there are big and small choices.
But what decision is correct? This question can create uncertainty, confusion....even blind panic!
Values Driven
But what if there isn't a 'right and wrong' decision in most cases?
Instead, what if life was a series of decision options, each with pros and cons? I believe this state represents reality more frequently than the right/wrong decision mindset.
How do you make decisions when there are no absolutes? One option is to focus on values-based choices and acts.
Values are broad beliefs that guide our lives and actions. They are beliefs that determine what is important to us. Values are subjective; no one can tell you what to prioritise (not even Mahatma Ghandi).
The list of potential values is enormous. Here are a few examples:
Trust
Honesty
Fun
Empathy
Relationships
Authenticity
Persistence
One advantage of values-driven behaviours is that you always remain true to what's important. In this way, you get something positive from every experience, no matter the outcome.
Values vs principles
We base principles on a person's values. Principles are rules to guide behaviour. For example, the value 'trust' may entail the principle 'I believe people say unless they are clearly lying'.
Goals are also different from values. Goals are specific targets to achieve. We can measure goals and know when they have been attained. Values do not have these concrete qualities.
Uncertainty Calculator
Values guide action during moments of uncertainty. The mind often goes blank in difficult situations. For example, how should someone act in a job that no longer has meaning? How do I respond to that disrespectful person? What is the best way to cope with low motivation? These are complex questions with no clear answer.
Values generate options. We encourage this by asking:
What is a values-consistent response in this situation?
Valuing self-acceptance, you may permit some laziness from time to time.
Valuing curiosity, you could keep a diary of thoughts when unmotivated.
Valuing relationships, you might schedule a series of social dates with friends and family.
Core Values Assessment
Here is an exercise to identify core values. You will find a core values list and further instructions. I get you to settle on three because it's too difficult to keep any more in mind during decision-making. Review and change this value system at any time. Values do change over the long term.
Using Core Values
Your three core values now guide decision-making uncertainty.
Use the question 'What's a values-based response in this situation?' whenever you experience doubt, uncertainty, or confusion. Values can help you stay true to the person you want to be. They also guide responses to various psychological challenges, ranging from low mood and social anxiety, to identity crises, being let down, or feeling guilty.
Remember, the focus is on values-consistent behaviour. The intention is not to achieve a specific outcome. Focus on the process, and let the result take care of itself.
Here is more information on decision-making and cognitive biases.
Core Values Quotes
If an opportunity is not aligned with that matters most to you (your core values), let it pass. The opportunities...you can't be excited about, just end up taking space where a better opportunity could be. Leanne Jacobs
Tying whether you feel good to an outcome can bite you in the ass. Brant Menswar
We are Coaching & Clinical Psychologists with extensive experience helping people conquer a range of wellbeing and performance issues at home and in the workplace. We can also help you to use core values effectively. Read more about our work, watch practical skills videos or browse other articles. Get in touch anytime.